The Great Shoe Debate
Posted in Pop Culture, Relationship on 25. Apr, 2010
Aside from money and sex one of the biggest areas of contention in a long term relationship seems to be woman’s obsession with shoes. Today we are going to try to understand the issue by having our resident guy and girl provide insight into what is really going on with this shoe issue.
We are going to disregard the obvious shoe fetish angle, so you shoe freak guys will have to get your fix somewhere else!
HE SAID:
Shoes, WTF! As I guy I can tell you that I understand there is a need for more than one pair of shoes. I myself have several shoes. So what kind of shoes are normal, acceptable, and maybe even required for everyday life?
Casual shoes: Your going to need some loafers, flip flops, or Jesus sandals for those days when you have to go outside on your day off to check the mail and you know people will look at you funny if your barefoot. Depending on your station in life will determine what type of casual foot ware you have, but everyone needs at least one set of casuals for the bummy days.
Sporty Shoes: Even if you don’t exercise (lazy bastard) your still gonna need to don a pair of sporty kicks when you take the kids to Disney or head to your friends house for some socializing. For the 30% of Americans that actually do exercise you’ll need something comfy that won’t irritate your hangnail while your huffing it down the road trying to whip your sorry ass into shape for the summer!
Work Shoes: Acceptable shoes that can appear in real man’s closet include a pair of nice brown shoes and nice black shoes. That’s it my friends. Sure you might be one of the new metro semi in the closet gay types that need more, but you need to be reading the woman’s section below where you’ll fine someone that thinks a bit more like you! Real men only need two colors that can go with whatever they might have to wear to work or parties.
There you have it. An acceptable shoe level for a real man’s closet would include a casual footwear, sneakers, and two pairs of dress shoes. That’s 4 pairs of shoes my friends. Anything more than that is completely unnecessary. So what’s with the women, the metros and the gays and their shoes fetish?
If you ask me it all boils down to the fact that you folks need to gift wrap yourself. Your far too interested in improving the way you look to others. Why would you need the same shoe in four colors? Is the shoe that damn cool that you gotta have the SAME shoe to match your blue pants, your pink pants, and your green pants??? Save all that money and let us buy a new Playstation 3 or save up for the 3-d televisions coming to market. At least that is something your going to use everyday day!
Remember your shoes don’t say who you are. The shit that comes out of your mouth and your actions determine who you are. Donate your shoes to charity and take some advice from the great Tyler Durden.. “The things you own end up owning you”.
SHE SAID:
Shoes… how can you not love them? I mean, who can have just 20 pairs, let alone just 3! Men will never understand that you don’t just need black, brown and a running pair of shoes. You need the black strappy, the black flat, the black sexy and the black dancing, and that’s just the black basics. Everyone has to have a variety to spice things up.
So why do women need so many shoes? Well, most women in the modern world get pedicures and what’s the point of pedicures if the shoes you have your pampered feet in are ugly or plain? When you pay $40 on your toes you want to make sure they are being showed off properly in equally nice heals.
Now another good reason why women love shoes so much is that they make us feel sexy. In the business world we are limited to the way we can dress. Anything too sexy classifies us as an office tramp, but men wont call someone a tramp because of their shoes. So a secretary or a CEO can look professional while wearing their super sexy 5 inch stilettos that have a little sparkle. It makes her feel sexy and not look like a slut.
But of course, if you wore the same sexy shoe every day, it would stop feeling sexy after a while. So… we buy lots of shoes to keep the feeling alive. I’m sure men can relate, shoes are to us as women are to you. If you stick with the same woman too long you get bored and stop feeling sexy, well same goes for our shoes. And just like men, only the good expensive ones are reliable while the cheap ones will let you down when you most need them!
